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Brunch Talk: Why I’m Making 2017 the Year of Saying No

2016 was without a doubt the year that I “fell back in love with myself.” It sounds odd {and a little corny} I know, but after taking control of my mental health, it was the first time in a LONG time that I felt like myself again.  For the first time, I wasn’t saying no to everything! Admittedly, it was pretty empowering, but scary at times too. I found myself doing things I’d been scared of the past handful of years and so it’s not hard for me to say that 2016 was the year I said yes. Yes to new experiences, yes to stepping outside of my comfort zone and yes to pushing myself – mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

Brunch Talk: Why to Make This the Year of Saying No Click To Tweet

So you can see how it sounds like a bit of a regression to come out and say that 2017 is my year of saying no. I promise it’s not and I’m excited to share why. While learning to say yes was important, this year I’m seeing that it’s just as important to recognize and respect my own personal limits by saying no.

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Brunch Talk: Why 2017 is the Year of Saying No
see outfit post here! dress c/o {sold out, use WNW20 for 20% off} + sunglasses + tassel earrings {ON SALE} + necklace c/o + bracelet + purse c/o + nail polish + lipstick

Saying No | With My Personal Life

Can we be real? Like really real? I shut off my personal life for a few years. Struggling with my self image made it difficult for me to maintain friendships {huge shoutout to my friends that have stuck by and dealt with me in every various stage I’ve gone through} and the idea of dating was completely laughable.

With some encouragement, I made the jump in 2016 and while I’m still eligible to be the next Bachelorette, it hasn’t been as awful as I envisioned. There’s been the good {Savannah patiently letting me tell her about a great date}, the bad {Whining to Lindsey over wine on New Year’s}, and the ugly {So many creeps out there}.

So what am I saying no to in terms of dating? Selling myself short. Settling. Dealing with men that are “new fashioned” in their ways of dating. {Don’t get me started on being a millennial/dating millennials. Queue the ‘why can’t they be like my dad?!’ rant.}

And with my friendships? Honestly, there’s not much I think I need to change! I made some really tough decisions a couple years back and cut off some negative friendships. I worried a lot that I’d regret it, but can still say it’s one of the best decisions I’ve made for myself. Find ladies {and gentlemen} that can support your goals, wishes and most importantly you. Life’s too short to be surrounded by people who’s motives you question.

Life's too short to be surrounded by people whose motives you question. Click To Tweet

Saying No | With The Blog

Last year, I hosted some events, took on new sponsorships and really grew as a blogger. I’m hoping that 2017 leads to more growth for What Nicole Wore but I’ve also done a lot of reflecting on this portion of my life.

I’m learning that saying no isn’t a bad thing. I’m no longer taking every sponsorship that’s offered to me or bending over backwards for an opportunity. Knowing my personal limits isn’t hard but accepting them can be for me. Admittedly, I’m one of the “why can’t I do it all?” types so saying no, even if it’s for my own sanity can be difficult.

Are you the 'Why can't I do it all' types? This post is for you: Click To Tweet

After overdoing it a few different times now, I think I’ve finally reached the conclusion that I have to give myself a little more grace and downtime by cutting back on some of the commitments that drain me more than usual. {Thank you Mama for quietly listening to me as I sorted this out.}

I’ve also reached a point where I understand my value from a business perspective. I won’t get into the long drawn out explanation of being an influencer, but I’ve gotten to a point where I get the power of what I do — which is pretty cool!

Saying No | With Finances

At the end of 2016, I took a large jump of faith and made blogging my job. I toyed with the idea for months and finally right before the holidays reached a decision. I thought for sure that I’d regret it and miss the daily routine of working, but I’ve thoroughly enjoyed becoming my own boss.

Sharing how cutting back on Target runs has helped my hoarder tendencies and my bank account! Click To Tweet

It has meant making some adjustments, I’m more financially aware and I try to be more conscious of what I’m spending. And with that, I’ve been practicing saying no. I’m not a “going out” type so being more responsible has meant only making one trip to Target a month, cutting back on Chick Fil A and less morning donut runs. Honestly, most sad about saying no to Chick Fil A. The cut back in Target runs has helped minimize my hoarder tendencies which is always a good thing.

I struggle with how much of my personal life to share online but also want to be able to share more than just my personal fashion.  I’m hoping to make the Brunch Talk series a monthly occurrence where I can be a little more open about my personal life. Finally, I’d love to hear if 2017 is a year of saying yes or no in the comments and what your toughest yes and no’s are!

Comments

  1. Emily says

    I am so glad you are finding your place! Saying no it’s definitely not a regression, knowing what your limitations are is something that makes you so much more mature and self aware than most people our age! I have been so impressed watching you grow your brand, you are amazing!

    • whatnicolewore@gmail.com says

      Thank you so much friend! I’m definitely learning the benefits of knowing my own limitations and respecting them (a little hard still but I’m trying haha!) So appreciative of your support ☺️💜 Hope you have an amazing first Mother’s Day! 😘😘

    • whatnicolewore@gmail.com says

      Totally get that Jessica! It’s hard to do but helps me stay sane haha

  9. Amy Ortiz says

    Loved reading this post! Sounds like you have a great head on your shoulders and are only setting yourself up for success!! Keep going babe!! XO

  14. Steph says

    Saying no is so hard for so many people. I never want to let anyone down, but sometimes you have to put yourself and your health at the top of your priority list. Good for you girl!

    xo,
    Steph
    @trendyinindy || trendyinindy.com

    • whatnicolewore@gmail.com says

      Girl. Same here. It’s hard to define those boundaries but worth it ❤️

  16. Stephanie says

    I think saying no is seriously important for everyone’s mental health. For me, it’s mostly saying no to too many things in one week. Living in the same home as two parents on medical disability, while also having severe health challenges myself, while also blogging full time, while also trying to date and have somewhat of a social life – it can all get to be too much! It’s important to just take a step back sometimes. I’m so glad you’re finding that to be helpful as well!

    Stephanie // SheSawStyle.com

  17. Lacey says

    Love this and couldn’t agree more! Learning to say no actually makes you more productive and so much happier!

    xx,

    Lacey

  23. Ada says

    You go girl! Saying no can be necessary sometimes. We can’t commit ourselves to every little thing or we will burn ourselves out, ya know?

  25. adriana says

    Saying “no” can be SO important for your sanity! Thank you for this reminder 🙂 I love your dress!