Last week, I tweeted out a hot take that’s been on my mind for awhile. “New bloggers, please stop sending messages to bloggers you don’t know expecting them to consult with you for free. It’s taken a lot of trial and error to get to this point on my own, you need to experience that journey too.” I expected to immediately see some backlash, but everyone’s responses were in agreement. Your business and blogging journey should be unique to you!
Your business and blogging journey should be unique to you! Here's why: Click To TweetThis post is all about why its important to have your own blogging journey PLUS I’m sharing a video recap of the blogger meet up I went to this weekend!
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Featured | Blogging Journey:
Blogging Journey | How Did I Start Out?
I get asked a lot about how I started a blog. Truthfully, I just did it. No bells, no whistles. Just bought a site domain, bought web hosting and went for it. Fast forward two years and I’ve made some changes but am still very much self taught. What Nicole Wore has always been trial and error for me. Not sure how something works? I’d open Google and Pinterest to do some research.
Maybe that’s why I find it insulting when people want to pick my brain about blogging; with blogging the knowledge is all out there, you just have to be willing to put in the hustle.
With blogging the knowledge is all out there, you just have to be willing to put in the hustle. Click To TweetAre there things I wish had clicked faster? Absolutely! But each decision, good or bad, that I’ve made in blogging has helped to shape both What Nicole Wore and me as a blogger.
Blogging Journey | But Nicole, What About Building a Community?
Don’t worry — community is still incredibly valuable and 100% something you should look to build. But think about how you go about making friends in your day to day life. You wouldn’t ask someone you just met how they became so caring/insert adjective here. Most of us know that it’s a long and likely personal journey. So why would you ask a blogger that you just met or don’t know how they became successful?
One of the best things I’ve read about this is from Jess! Last year she wrote a post about networking titled, ‘Stop Asking People to Coffee!’ While the whole post is a GREAT read, this portion below sticks out to me.
“By giving before you take, you establish a relationship with a person way before you ever ask for their time. (Something that people are very protective of, even more than money!)
Maybe you follow them on social media and cultivate a friendly conversation that way–letting them know your feedback on their articles or blog posts, retweeting their tweets, etc. I can’t tell you how many great friends I’ve made online that I’ve never met in person! You can bet that when I see their name pop up in my [over 1,000 unread emails, oy] inbox, they’re going to be the first I reply to and go out of my way to help. Because that’s what friends do! If you try to take before you give, you’ll probably never develop a real friendship.” — Jess Keys, the Golden Girl Blog
I think what Jess wrote then still rings so true. If you’re looking to build a community with bloggers, you need to do so for the right reasons. It shouldn’t just be about what can I get from these people, but more of a collective effort to strengthen the power of your local blogging community. Relationships still are SO important, even in a field as independent as blogging.
Blogging Journey | Rome Wasn’t Built In a Day.
I know that’s super cliche, but it’s 100% true with blogging. I’m constantly reevaluating, thinking of new ways I can connect with my audience, location scouting, the list goes on. Part of what makes each win so sweet is knowing how much hard work I’ve put into reaching that point. Being jealous of others’ wins is devaluing the work, sweat, blood and tears that they’ve put in.
Being jealous of others’ wins is devaluing the work, sweat, blood and tears that they’ve put in. Click To TweetSimilarly, asking someone to do something for you devalues their time and their hit or misses. By cheating yourself of those experiences, you’re setting yourself up for failure.
Before you get mad, think about an accomplishment in your life that you’re genuinely proud of. How many speed bumps were in the road? How many times did you have to change your approach? When things didn’t work out did you ask someone else to do it for you or did you ask for help? Now think about the pride you feel for that accomplishment. Would you feel the same way about it if it had been handed to you?
Your blogging journey should be personal and unique to you. It should reflect the seasons that you’re experiencing in your life. Most importantly, your blogging journey should feature genuine storytelling. No one can tell your story as well as you can, so don’t ask someone else to dictate or guide it.
Blogging Journey | Blogger Meet Up Recap:
On a somewhat lighter note, below is a super quick video from behind the scenes of the Bluegrass Bloggers meet up that I attended this weekend:
Blogging Journey | Share on Pinterest:
SHOP THE POST | BLOGGING JOURNEY:
This is honestly one of the best posts I’ve read in awhile. It is SO true! I’ve been blogging on-and-off for three years and no one helped me get started… which I’m now thankful for. It’s taken me a long time to grow, it’s taking forever to grow my Instagram, but that’s part of my journey. This is so spot-on and thank you for sharing!! It’s always such a joy to reach those accomplishments on your own.
Ah so glad to hear that, thank you! I always get a little nervous posting these haha. And yes, this is my second blog and I’m so grateful for all of the good and bad learning experiences I’ve been lucky enough to have!
Love this! Blogging isn’t easy as writing a post and putting it out there! It takes so much thought and effort to start with an ential idea up until you post and promote it!
Absolutely! It’s funny how many people don’t see all the work that goes in!
It is so great to have a mentor at the beginning to get you started but then you kind of need to do your own thing. It is important to forge your own path!
xo Jessica
http://www.whatsfordinneresq.com
So true Jessica! I think that picking a mentor should be a lot more tailored than some people look for it to be as well!
So true! I’m a new blogger, and already I’ve spent HOURS UPON HOURS trying to learn everything and figure it all out. If I hadn’t spent all that time cursing WordPress, researching SEO, and agonizing over my theme, the final product just wouldn’t be as sweet! Blogging isn’t easy, but that’s what makes it so rewarding!
Exactly! It’s definitely overwhelming when you start out but I think that’s part of what makes it so sweet!
Really loving the mix of prints with the leopard and the skirt! Looking super chic girl!
xoxo
Sarah Lindner
http://www.thehouseofsequins.com
Aww thank you Sarah!
Yes girl yes! Could not agree more, and so well written! When I first saw your tweet I felt the same way, and was so happy someone else was thinking it too, ha.
Everyone’s blogging journey is different, and it’s HARD work! Like you said, Pinterest and Google are out there so definitely use it! Community is so important, but I think there’s a respectful way to learn from more established bloggers.
xx, Jamie
I’m so glad you connected! I never want to seem mean so I was apprehensive about tweeting and then writing about it.
And I completely agree with what you said: community is important but respect is just as important too!
This is such a fun outfit! Thanks for sharing your thoughts on having your own blogging journey, it’s definitely true that everyone’s will be different!
Thanks so much Stefanie!
Ah girly I so agree with this! I began my blog almost 5 years ago as a college freshman, just looking for a fun creative outlet to share my thoughts about college and my outfits (all shot with iphone and crappy digital camera 😉 ). I had no idea at the time that you could even make money blogging…. it took me a whole YEAR just to learn that! Lol. Great thoughts in this post… good things take time!
xoxo A
http://www.southernbelleintraining.com
Aww thank you for reading Annaliese! I’m so glad to hear I’m not the only one that started their blog with an iPhone and crappy camera 😂
YES. A thousand times YES. I wrote a post that blew up in January about supporting other bloggers – but that in no way means doing the work for them. I have a blogger resource library with simple stuff laid out (how to come up with a blog name, etc) but anything more I consult (and charge) for. Thank you for validating my feelings!!
It makes me so happy to hear that we’re on the same page! I’ve spent months thinking it was just me 😂 I really want to work on building my own posts about starting a blog so that I’m able to point Bloggers that approach me to those. And now I’m off to go read this post because it sounds spot on!!
This post is so perfect and I hope everyone reads it before they email/message anymore of us for help. This has become a daily occurrence for me and I can’t take it anymore!
I’m so glad to hear it’s just as frustrating to others! The influx of requests almost becomes overwhelming!
This is so great. As a new blogger who bought a domain one random day this past December, I completely agree. I have been learning so much on my own and am still learning. It’s a long process and not something you can grow overnight. I have had days where I am just tired and frustrated, but the next day can be exciting. Every day is different and is a working process.
Thanks Morgan! I had so many good, bad, and funny moments during my first year of blogging. It’s such a learning curve and such a fun time!
Absolutely love that skirt you are wearing! And also what a great post on the value of blogging. I love that you shared that ‘the info is already all out there, you just have to put in the hustle.’ <–so true!
Thanks so much Marilyn! It’s so true, these days theres a resource out there for everything!
I totally agree with you lady! It’s so important to learn for yourself what works, and what doesn’t. It’s allllll about the process!
Rachel / http://www.helloher.co
You know I agree 100% with that!
Did you hear me screaming amen from Sacramento CA?!!?!? This post is SO good and rings so true to my heart. I started in Jan of 2015 with an iphone and a ghetto wordpress page…. clueless but had a big dream. I had to ask a lot of questions along the way, made friends, shared thoughts and information and most of us grew together. We have each others cell phone numbers and we are running this race hand in hand…. I loved this statement “If you’re looking to build a community with bloggers, you need to do so for the right reasons. It shouldn’t just be about what can I get from these people, but more of a collective effort to strengthen the power of your local blogging community.” and also THIS… ” Most importantly, your blogging journey should feature genuine storytelling. No one can tell your story as well as you can, so don’t ask someone else to dictate or guide it.” LOVED THIS mama!!
I’m so glad to hear it resonated with you! ❤️❤️❤️ and yasss to starting with an iPhone 😂🙌🏽 same here!
Yes yes yes! And really, there are paid things out there you can do if you really want to take a “class” from someone. I’m so glad I’ve learned as I went and have a community too!
Your skirt looks absolutely gorgeous on you 🙌🏽 Love this post! Very motivating x
Thanks so much Amelia! 💗
All I can say is… AMEN!!! Thank you, Nicole! I must say, I love how refreshing this was to read. I love your strictly style content, but I really LOVEEEEE this! Sharing all over! <3
Thanks so much Summer! It’s definitely a little intimidating to share what’s on my mind but I’m glad to hear it’s resonated with so many creative minds ❤️
I totally agree- I started not knowing anything and learned as I went along. It can get really annoying when people you don’t even know, want to “pick your brain” and buy you coffee.
Amen!!
I love this post! I think there’s so much info out there, and for us bloggers who have been doing this for 6 plus years, we had NOTHING. So it can be frustrating when people just ask for all the tips/help when we had to figure it out ourselves. Always great to learn things on your own and do a bit of trial and error.
xo Jessica
My Style Vita
Amen! I’m so glad there were resources when I started my blog but I also relied so much on Pinterest/Google that I guess I wonder why other people can’t do the same haha. I think the trial and error definitely is part of the journey!
What a great post girl! I am starting to get more and more requests from new bloggers too and at first I was excited to lend my hand to help, but you are right, everyone needs to learn on their own. There wasn’t anyone to help me when I first started out it was just trial and error on what to do.
P.S. I really love this outfit! 🙂
Thanks Nataly! I struggle a lot with the line between being helpful and preventing someone from growing on their own; it’s tough too to sacrifice your own time.
Such great insight here girl! I totally agree that everyone’s journey is different and the learning experience of figuring it out on your own is so important, too.
xx, Danielle | Pineapple & Prosecco
This post was so good. I totally agree with you on a lot of these points. It’s great to network in a way that’s natural and organic, but it can’t be forced. Loved this.
Thank you so much for reading Kallie!
The amount of love I have for this post is unreal. It seems that even more so recently, girls just think that out of nowhere they should ask for your time and advice, sometimes if they don’t even know you at all. I think that if you’ve established a great friendship and are willing to share tips and tricks with each other, that’s one thing, but if you’re really interested in succeeding … you gotta be willing to do some serious research on your own. Working hard for what you want is so important!!! Thank you thank you for sharing this!!!
Aww thanks so much for your two cents! I’m so glad to hear that others agree that sacrificing your time can be too much sometimes. And I totally agree, with blogging you have to change your approach so often that it’s important to be able to do the research and make adjustments on your own in order to be successful.
Such a babe!!! Love that handbag. It’s perfect with your outfit.
xoxo,
Angelle
http://www.dashingdarlin.com
Thank you Angelle! Hope you had a great Tuesday!
It’s amazing how people assume that blogging is “easy” that there is no work that is put into it. I love your post it really resonates with me, amazing job! Plus your outfit is adorable!
Aww thank you Laura! I’m so glad you could relate ❤️
Love how you mixed prints with your bag!
x
Missy
http://popofstyle.com
Thanks Melissa! This lemon bag is so fun 💛
Thanks so much for this post! I agree – No one can tell your story like you can!
Aww thank you Sydney! I’m glad you connected with it!
This is all so true. I really like the part about reminding yourself about how far you have come. Needed this reminder. Thank you for such a great post.
Thanks so much for reading Taylor! Glad you were able to relate ❤️❤️
I couldn’t agree more! Best post I’ve read in awhile!!
Thanks so much Ashley! ❤️
This is so true. Everyone’s blogging journey is different and something they have to experience for themselves!
Greta | http://www.gretahollar.com
It really helps people grow as bloggers!
Great post! It’s great to have mentors and friends to help but I definitely think that learning as you go makes you a better blogger (or just better business person in general!).
Thanks Nina! Yes, when I first tweeted about this my friend that owns a boutique immediately said she sees it a ton too!
YES! I completely agree with you gal. It’s been a lot of hard work, I don’t want to just hand that over.
xo Laura Leigh
http://www.louellareese.com
Absolutely! Glad you could relate!
Love this post and also LOVE your outfit!!!
– Mary
http://www.MissMaryPowers.com
Aww thank you Mary!
Such a great post! And that skirt is fabulous!
Thank you Anna!
Blogging is very rewarding but it also requires a lot of work… and can also have a lot of ups and downs!! But it’s by far my favorite thing!
I love it but yes, lots of ups and downs!
Very valid points! I really like how you talked about this, because this topic could get a little taboo. I can 100% see your point. Building a brand is tough work and there’s no easy way around it. Time is precious, and we need to be cautious of how we use it. At the same time, you started somewhere. I reached out to a bigger blogger when I first started, because I truly admired her. She responded back with so much support, and to this day I look up to her even more. Don’t need to share all your secrets, but a little help goes a long way with people. If they are going to be greedy, then thats kinda drawing the line. Great post, and I’m really glad you talked about this!
xoxo Bryanna | Coming in Clutch
What a well-written post. There were a few how-to-blog type posts that did the rounds a few years ago where “collaborate with a bigger blogger” was all the rage, but I think the bigger blogs became weary of being a check mark on a to-do list. the journey changes every day, and to me that is half the fun. found you on Visible Mondays.